HAPPY LOZMAS EVE!
There’s got to be some reverse voodoo to that number combo surely. Some magic indication that I will wake up and some spectacular miracle is going to be awaiting me. Right now? I’m sitting here having a war with a friend over messenger of thumbs up. Totally mature way to bring in the new year. Yes new year, I know what I said. There has always been something sacred about my birthday for me. It is a day of promise for. I suppose, as humble as every year tends to be.
From an early age I conjured a notion that EVERYONE should have a day where they believe ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN!
Love like Valentines day, generosity like Christmas, treats like Easter. Something once a year to look forward to. For me it was the birthday. Like each one brought a new beginning, a chance to look back and deconstruct the year, lock away the good and process the negative. Leave the bad behind. To decide what you want to do with the next year, set goals (to mostly forget or abandon over the next year) and to appreciate that I will NEVER be this young again.
It is also a good reason to celebrate SURVIVAL!
A great many people won’t make their next birthday. You could have the wonderful, blessed life in existence and you could be struck down in a heartbeat by a car, hell you can die by eating poorly cooked chicken. I have made it through some pretty hectic stuff.
SO YAY! Celebrate life and avoiding death by getting your head stuck in a toilet seat or something more serious.
To give credit where credit is due, this year may have been the fulfilling yet. I have had my resolve and strength tested pretty hard. I know it is going to face an even bigger challenge over the coming months but I have made it this far. I have done it by following my OWN path. I have no interest in hurting others and never endeavor to succeed off another’s back. I feel confident that if I can just keep level of faith in myself, it’s going to be OK AND NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!
So my year in review!
- I secured a house
- Began volunteer work
- Started studying toward my dream job
- Bj into school (team effort paid off, he even represented his class in public speaking and only had one day off)
- Started helping with literacy groups at my son’s school
- Got Corby D into school (team effort)
- Resolved several financial issues (many more remain *tightens tie*)
- Got the internet on (huge for me)
- Was nominated nationally as volunteer of the year (one of 19 finalists in the individual category)
- Publicly spoke to a room full of influential strangers about my homeless experience and was brought on board to be a part of future meetings.
- Had my story documented, recorded and presented to hundreds as part of a white ribbon breakfast (to be published later online and in print)
- Joined a gym
- QUIT DRINKING (a life long habit)
- Learned a whole new skill set when it comes to work (crisis support)
- Took up arms against my daemons by tracking down my Psych
- Was able to speak on behalf of homeless people everywhere to those who create change
So so many things I never dreamed possible. I have had whole hearted hugs from people in tears thanking me just for doing my job. I spend my spare time doing something meaningful for me. I have learned my capacity to love and that it’s OK to love even if it isn’t returned the same way. I have dried little tears, held little hands, been driven insane and returned the favor. There is so much I haven’t mentioned. All good.
All in one year..AND I’M JUST GETTING STARTED!